My mom knows me.

My mom knows me.  Like realllllly knows me.  A text she sent me earlier this afternoon read "tickled PINK & blessed in BLUE is missing you and so am I."  My mom knows me.  She knows that it was time for me to write.  Time for me to put my feelings into words -- and sometimes it's just easier to type them, then to speak them.  My mom knows me.

I've said it before and I've typed it before ... living the baseball lifestyle is hard.  SO hard.  People say things like ... "it won't be forever" or "you knew what you were getting yourself into."  I swear if I hear either of these phrases again I may lose it completely.  Yes, both of these phrases are true.  Baseball won't last forever and I guess you could say I knew what I was getting myself into.  BUT ... it doesn't make it any easier.  I really didn't know what it would be like to be a baseball wife ... or a mother ... and definitely not a baseball wife & mother at the SAME TIME!

I'm a single parent most of the year.  I love being home with my kids more than anything but it can be quite the challenge, especially after adding number three.  I'm saddened that the hubs misses out on so much of our family time ... the firsts, the exciting adventures, the bad days, the great days.  As Abby said about a month ago, "our family is kind of like a puzzle Mom ... always missing a piece."  Seriously kid?  Did she really say that?!

I'm beyond grateful for the lifestyle that we are able to live.  I'm thankful for a husband that works hard, plays for his fans, and gives back to the community.  He's such a special soul when he allows others to see that.  I'm his biggest fan ... his biggest supporter ... and I'm here for the long haul.  We've been through ups and downs with baseball and I have a feeling that the rollercoaster is still on the tracks.

Our lifestyle is unique.  Different.  Challenging.  Satisfying.  Would I trade it?  Probably not.  I just miss family time together ... I miss the laughter.  I miss the fun.  I miss the awesome team that the hubs and I make.  I miss the offseason.  Is it time yet?!

I know I just rambled on ... vented a little.  But I feel better and my thoughts don't seem too jumbled anymore.  Writing is my refuge.  My mom knows me.